Am I the only one without an end plan?

Starting a patisserie course has sparked many questions from the gallery.  Everyone wants to know what I am going to do when I finish my course.  Most people are not satisfied with my response when I say that I don’t know.

Questions like ‘You must have some idea?’ or ‘Why are you doing it then?’ have been thrown my way.

I am beginning to wonder whether most people have an end plan.  Do most people plan their lives, get jobs, and enrol in courses knowing exactly where they are headed?  Am I in the minority by not having an end plan?

My reluctance to plan out my life has brought me to this year, my year of discovery. It is likely that my go with the flow attitude will mean that at the end of my year, I may still not have an end plan and maybe I never will.

My lack of planning is intentional.  I want to leave myself open to experience everything that life has to offer and take advantage of opportunities that come my way.  I’m not sitting on the couch all day receiving an unemployment benefit, I’m keeping busy.

I work 4 days a week. I do yoga, boxing and running. I have one midweek class and an all day Saturday class.  I’m also trying to finish my agents representative course, keep up to date on social media and trying stay in touch with friends and family.  I’m also in the process of looking for a new job, because my current job is not challenging enough and I’m bored.  Sometimes I feel like I’m doing everything and nothing.

It’s possible that I will work in the hospitality industry when I finish my course, but then again I might run away and join the circus.  Anything is possible.

I guess when I think about it, my end plan is to survive and to get to the end of my life having lived the best possible life I could.



An interview that could change my life

I am still in pursuit of my dreams and in the process trying to work out what I want to do when I grow up. This week I took another small step towards something new and exciting. I had an interview. It wasn’t a job interview, but it could definitely lead me down a different career path.

As I sat on the train heading home afterwards, I reflected on my outing. That one little interview, that small amount of time out of my day could have just set things in motion that would change the rest of my life.

As I impatiently wait the next two weeks to hear whether I am in or out, I’m brushing up on some skills.


Troubled by a dream

The other night I had a dream that I went back to being an Environmental Health Officer. In my dream I was happy. I awoke from my dream a little annoyed with myself. Do I want to be a Health Inspector again?? My immediate thought was NO!! So why am I dreaming about it with so much fondness. What am I missing?

I am at week 4 in my new job. Recently I completed my timesheet. Sitting at my desk, I peered down at my total number of hours worked for the fortnight. It was 42. Uncontrollably a broad smile filled my face which soon turned into laughter. This was crazy; I only worked 42 hours in two weeks. Before I had decided to take my gap year, I would work more than that in one week. I was stressed, grumpy and tired, uninspired and felt unappreciated.

Although my income is significantly less then it once was, I didn’t think it mattered because I am happy. But I am beginning to wonder whether I am missing some of the challenges that come with a higher paid job……

The knockers

Recently I had a tough weekend at the office.  I say the office because I don’t have a job at the moment and some social occasions are feeling a little like work.

On a normal day I like to think that the world sees me as a strong, positive and outgoing person, but recently my spirit was given a little battering.

Over the course of a day and night I felt attacked, berated and interrogated by a series of people who I had called my friends. I was put in the hot seat and pumped for information continually. Tell me about your life, what are you doing? Where are you going? Why don’t you have a job?  Are you looking for a job? How do you feel about not having a job? Are you ok? Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?

I was criticised for my ideas not being creative enough or for not putting myself far enough out of what they thought was my comfort zone.

I had a number of demands from people wanting to read my personal writing catalogue, so they can provide me with feedback and then was berated for my writing being for myself and not wanting to share. Apparently everyone needs feedback……

Nothing was off limits. It was open slather on my life.  For most people who have been searching for something like a job for a while, you would relate to having some bad days. The self doubt, the frustration, the knock backs. It takes effort to not dwell on the past and move on.  Every week I feel proud of myself for not dwelling on the things that I cannot change, I am constantly thinking of new ideas or tactics and keep going. I am on a journey of discovery and I’m not looking for a quick fix, so I know it will take me a little while to get to where I want to be.

Although these were not the first people who had queried my life and my job choices, it was the severity of the attacks that left me feeling a little taken back.

Although I have since picked myself up and moved from the conversations of the weekend, things are still lingering in my mind.  I’m angry that I allowed the criticism and judgements of others to effect me so much and wonder why the opinions of people I know affect me more than others.

I have decided to distance myself from the people who are critical and judgemental of my life.  I think that your friends are a reflection of yourself and their attacks and negativity are not a representation of who I am and I would never do that to anyone.

In light of my weekend and my decisions to move on, I have decided to do something positive. I’m going to do something nice and brighten someone else’s day.  🙂

32 New things and beyond

I have started a to do list. There are more than 32 items on this list, this is because it is not a list of all the things I’m going to do; it’s a list of possibilities and suggestions. Some are a little out there, like having a baby.   Maybe that will happen one day, but right now it’s a little too much commitment for the sake of doing something new.

My list wasn’t easy.  I have travelled, lived in another country, jumped out of a plane, attempted to learn a new language (many times), slept under the stars, partied at some of the world’s biggest events and shouted Oh My God when in range of a celebrity.

I want my 32 things to be completely new experiences, but they also need to be things that interest me. I do love action in my life, but not all the things will be jaw dropping exciting.  I think it’s nice sometimes to have a quiet day or do something rewarding.

I have already ticked off items 1-4 below, who knows what else is to come. The big goal is to complete the 32 new things before I turn 33 on 4 January 2014, there is only 263 days to go.

I will refine my list at some stage. Here are my options for now. I would love to hear your thoughts and any further suggestions.

  1. Create a blog
  2. Sell stuff online
  3. Go scarecrow hunting
  4. Visit Maggie beers farm
  5. Donate blood
  6. Be a movie/tv extra
  7. Be a tourist in my own town and send postcards to friends and family
  8. Go to the Melbourne Cup
  9. Volunteer…….
  10. Have a Cartoon picture of myself drawn
  11. Get involved in the food truck craze
  12. Eat one of Adriano Zumbo’s creations
  13. Host a high tea
  14. Make Italian sausages with Dad
  15. Learn to cook an amazing sponge cake
  16. Take pole dancing classes, apparently its good exercise
  17. Learn a martial art
  18. Try Yoga or Pilates
  19. Go to a life drawing class
  20. Learn why people appreciate Chardonnay
  21. Read a Mills and Boon
  22. Brew Beer or Cider
  23. Go to Camel Races
  24. Go to a professional cricket match
  25. Participate in the Masters Games
  26. Make an old family recipe. E.g. cooking tripe with Grandma’s white sauce.
  27. Participate in a 5km fun run and smash it in under 30 mins
  28. Count my blessings
  29. Travel somewhere new
  30. Feature some way in a publication e.g photo, name etc
  31. Dine at a celebrity chef restaurant in Australia
  32. Grow something new
  33. Start crocheting
  34. Cook something crazy like a croquembouche
  35. Take a ride with my cousin while he does aerobatics
  36. Go visit family in Queensland
  37. Write my Will and departing letters to loved ones.
  38. Ride a new rail trail with my hubby (his suggestions)
  39. Borrow a friends kayak
  40. Have a baby (a suggestion from a persistent friend)
  41. Write a recipe book
  42. Audition for a reality TV show.
  43. Enter a writing competition
  44. Invent something awesome
  45. Participate in Tough Mudder
  46. Volunteer Abroad
  47. Complete random acts of kindness
  48. Take a drama class
  49. Participate in an amateur theatre production
  50. Go line dancing.
  51. Get a tattoo
  52. Be a model in a life drawing class
  53. Make cheese
  54. Make a patchwork quilt

32 new things

So far my 2013 has been consumed with me finding a job, which is incredibly boring. I have decided to shake things up a little to get my year of discovery back on track. This year, in my 32nd year of life I will do 32 new things.

Let’s kick it off with #1 My blog. This is a first for me. My biggest challenge will be to maintain it for the entire year.

Suggestions for my 32 new things are welcome, although may not be acted on…..